BDSM Education for the Uneducated: A Dom ignoring a safeword is never okay. There is never a good reason...

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

thatonechick42:

beautifulkink:

bdsmisnotabuse:

A Dom ignoring a safeword is never okay. There is never a good reason for it. There is never a decent excuse.

A safeword is put in place to ensure the safety and comfort level of the bottom. If that is being ignored, something is wrong. If the Top does not consider that safeword the end-all,…

I also want to add that in the BDSM community there is a huge debate about this my personal thoughts are that in the beginning there should always be a safe word and if your Dom does not like it or will not allow you to use it then he is no MAN let alone a DOM!!! 

If later on down the line you both choose that a safe word is not needed then that is your choice personally I like to have a safe word but I usually never have to use it with the right partner but it is good practice to have it if you are trying new play for you and your partner. For safety reasons and also for your Dom they may be able to read your body well but in a new kind of kink you both don’t know how you will react!! 

Just some food for thought ! 

Cheers Kiki

Safe words are your friends, you guys.

A dom ignoring a safe word is both a SERIOUS violation of trust and makes any further sexual activity after they’ve ignored the safe word sexual assault as far as I’m concerned…a safe word is there to tell someone to stop…ignoring it is NEVER okay

The only reason I can submit to my girlfriend is because I know with all my heart that she will ALWAYS listen when I use our safeword…

Exactly.

There seems to be a sort of phenomenon among some Dom/mes (though mostly guys, I’ve found) where they think there are things called True Doms and True subs, and a True sub lives to please their Dom/me, and lets them have free rein, and gives their Dom 24/7 control of them, and feels that their consent is not needed in a scene, and never uses a safeword…whereas anyone who thinks just like they do is a True Dom and anyone who disagrees with them, is not.

It’s 100% bullshit, incidentally. A lot of the community runs on labels, because they’re there to clarify, to make things easier for everyone involved, because if you’re a sadist but you’re flirting with a self-professed sub, then you need to find out whether or not they also have masochistic tendencies or there’s a good chance a prospective scene between you wouldn’t work out without some serious ground rules. Labels used for the common good. And then there’s douchebags who use labels not to ease the way for everyone, but to shame others and bully. Because a true sub doesn’t use a safeword, and if you walk out of a scene with them because of it, you’re not a true sub, and they’re going to tell everybody.

It’s kind of like an easy game of “spot the douchebag I wouldn’t touch with a six-foot riding crop if he was the last Dom on earth”.